Technology and new ideas about sex and gender have dramatically changed the laws of love, from who pays for dinner to how long to wait to call after a date.
“It’s sort of like the Wild West out there,” says Alex Manley, dating and sex editor at Ask
“If you think you know the rules, some new app will come along and reinvent the rule book.” Here’s how to play the game now.
“It opens up a kind of flirty dialogue of like, ‘You can pay for the next date,’ ” he says.
Manley is on the same page, but his reasoning is more economical: “Guys still [usually] make more money than women, so they should offer to pay, regardless of whoever asked out whom,” he says.
“There’s a sort of New Age chivalry about that.” Unfortunately, the rule seems even less clear for those in the LGBT community, says Morningside Heights resident and comedian Stephanie Foltz, who is bisexual.
Foltz, 29, says it can be tricky, but that gender norms are still at play.
“I have a more masculine energy, so I usually pay on the first date,” she says.
One of the first times Foltz took the initiative and asked a guy out, it went really well. “It ended up being one of the most romantic experiences of my life.” She believes making the first move gave the man a helpful confidence boost.